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Stupid Holiday Crap

Every year it gets worse.

I walk around this suburban Florida neighborhood before the holidays — the major ones mostly — and just when all the media is talking about what dire straits we’re in, people are spending the few pennies they have to rub together to decorate their yards with this Chinese-made junk. That’s not a slam against the Chinese, but rather against the utter lack of imagination people around here seem to have about stretching their budgets and their minds. It just kills me….(little attempt at Halloween humor there)

We used to make scare-crows out of hay and old clothes and take corn stalks from the garden to decorate with. Nothing was simple and there were usually scrapes and bumps that reminded you for weeks of your efforts.

What do kids today have to show for their cheesy holiday yard crap and costumes bought from Target?

Sure, I would have gone wild when I was a kid for what I now see as junk, but I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t have remembered a damn thing about them the following year. Have parents really gotten this lazy?

With the absence of storage in the houses here in Florida, this stuff just takes up space until next year unless they throw it away (you should see trash day after any holiday down here). I can’t wait till the archaeologists start digging up stuff in a thousand years and find perfectly intact plastic ghosts, skeletons, and gravestones. Can you imagine what they’re gonna think???

Geez, do I sound jaded? I love my little neighborhood but every time I look at this stuff, another cluster of my own brain cells dies. I guess I just won’t leave the house until January.

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Categories: Life
  1. October 19, 2008 at 1:57 am

    Oh, I hate that crap, too. We do all the holidays the old fashioned way here… nothing inflatable… nothing making an annoying humming sounds… nothing sucking enormous amounts of power. Well, except the year that Rick put lights all over the house a la Sparky Griswold in Christmas vacation. There was a surprising jump in the power bill that holiday.

  2. October 19, 2008 at 2:01 am

    Well, we all need to binge a little sometimes, I guess….

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